Pastor's Message


June 17, 2018
 

 
Performing a Wedding and Preparing for a Marriage
 
The Eucharist is the source and summit of the Christian life.  This celebration of the Mass unites us as Catholics.  From this and within it, we celebrate sacramental Baptism, Communion, Confirmation, Ordination and once a year, the Anointing of the Sick.  On occasion, we have had a Wedding at a parish Mass.  I believe it is important for a person preparing to marry in Our Lady of Grace or St. Joseph worship regularly for a period of time.  It is important to cultivate community and become a part of the parish.  From this involvement comes the desire to marry here when a parishioner is ready.
 
From now on, we will not accept a wedding for people who register just to get married here.  We expect you will worship for a period of six months before we even set a date for a wedding.  I find that some people think that selecting a church is like picking a reception venue.  Once you satisfy this requirement, we can set a date one year in advance from that time.  We are not a typical parish.  We have people who move to Hoboken from all over the country and even world.  Some people decide to marry in their home parish or elsewhere and I will not give permission to anyone who has not worshipped for six months.
 
In my 13 years here, I have found the most fulfilling weddings of couples or individuals who have made this their parish and come to church regularly, get involved and support the church in a variety of ways through time, talent and treasure.  I will not be forced by anyone to set a date for a marriage.  If that is what you are looking for, please go elsewhere.
 
I also feel an obligation to people who live in Hoboken.  There are scores of churches within miles of OLG/ St, Joseph.  It’s not the beauty of the church that should attract you but the desire to build community in this lovely church and making your faith grow.  And that takes me to the last point: a wedding is one day, a marriage is a lifetime.  Too many couples and families focus on wedding planners, reception venues, photography, videography and all the overblown and expensive aspects of weddings in this day and age.  Without the spiritual and sacramental components, a wedding does not automatically become a marriage.  Please share this message with your friends.   I pray for all who search.  Plan your wedding but make it a true marriage that is steeped in Catholic tradition and the community of faith.
 
Peace,
Fr. Alex Santora


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